too busy to feel at ease? finding freedom and peace within structure and nutty schedules
September 28, 2011
So I used to think freedom and ease could only be found on vacation. I used to think it could only be found at rest. How could anybody be really busy–working a lot, going out a lot, seeing friends and family a lot, and getting their exercise in, too—and possibly feel that sense of deep peace and wellbeing that most of us feel only on vacation?
How can freedom be found within so much structure and formation?
Simple. Not easy. Simple, but powerful: We create our own foundation within the structure and formation.
The highly effective lawyer, mom, wife, sister, daughter, friend, seminar facilitator gets asked to host a Tupperware party. She checks in, asks herself, “What’s important to me? Is this something I truly want to do? Where does it fit in my priorities?” Work, kids, husband, friends, sister, mom and dad, seminars…Tupperware? Scratch that.
The author, university prof, food writer, friend, sister, daughter, sometimes TV host gets asked to be on the board of a non-profit in line with her interests. She says ‘yes.’ She goes to a few meetings. They feel draining, exhausting, boring. She checks in, asks herself, “What’s important to me? Where does this fit?” She politely resigns.
The crazy busy copy writer, bride-to-be, sister, daughter, friend, lover gets asked to do more work, more work, more work, more work, please! She says yes until the day it’s too much. Then she checks in, asks herself, “Where does this fit in the grand scheme of what’s important to me?” She begins to say ‘yes’ to certain requests only, and puts others on hold.
What is important to you?
What do you value most?
Are we willing to make decisions based on our values—rather than societal pressures?
And what happens when we do?
Here’s what I’ve noticed:
– We’re happier
– We question ourselves less
– We feel more certain about our choices
– We like our lives better, and ourselves better
– We feel more at ease, at peace, and free
Because when we make choices and decisions based on our own foundation, or value system, we’re honouring our essential self. And when we honour and act from our essential self we begin to live the lives we were born for. We begin to live our dharma.