I talk with a lot of people who feel called. Not just dreamers, these are people who cannot imagine continuing on without listening to that something that is driving them and pulling them in another direction. Are you one of these people? Do you ever feel like the calling is too hard, or like giving up? You’re not alone.
I’ve been there. The people I talk with have been there.
And here are
1. Developmental psychology teaches that life keeps handing us the opportunity to grow as a human being. When we get pressed up against something that makes us feel like giving up, we’re being given the opportunity to choose something that will grow us, rather than shrink us back into our old, limited selves.
2. A more spiritual take is this: our unlimited, bright and shining soul is always leading the way. And at each juncture in our life that offers us up the choice between fear and love, we’re invited to continue to choose the one that takes us up and out of the lower rungs on the consciousness ladder. That is, to choose love instead of fear.
3. Resistance can be an indication we’re getting close to the end. We usually experience the most internal resistance–which can often show up as the inkling to give up–at the very beginning and when we’re close to the end. In other words, it can feel most tempting to give up when we’re very close to succeeding.
4. The change cycle helps us see that when things get hardest, we’re closest to success. The change cycle shows that in Square 3, right before Square 4–full flight–we hit the hardest times. The mantra for this square is: “This is harder than I thought it would be. And that’s ok.”
5. Thomas Edison tried over 1,000 times to create the lightbulb. The story goes: An interviewer said to Edison “Didn’t it bother you, failing that many times?” Edison said: “No. It wasn’t failing. It was just another try.” Failure is not something that might happen to you. Failure is how you will get there.
Something very exciting happened to me recently. I got my first rejection from a book publisher! The letter came in the mail. I was holding my breath. And then I read the lines “We’re very sorry, but you’re book isn’t a good fit for our roster at this time.” I started jumping up and down. Dancing around the living room. Singing at the top of my lungs.
James Patterson, America’s #1 best selling writer, had his first novel rejected 33 times. This is a story we hear over and over and over again–that people who have experienced great success have also experienced what others might consider failure.
So, when I got my first rejection letter I got excited. I didn’t think, “Oh, this book is terrible, I should give up.” I thought to myself: “The first hardest step is done. I’m getting even closer!” I just got my first rejection letter–this is so exciting!
Every successful writer has experienced rejection. Even more importantly, every successful writer continues to experience rejection. Failure is not something that might happen to you. Failure is how you will get there.
The people who succeed aren’t necessarily destined. They’re also determined.
I love this quote: “You must love the art in yourself more than yourself in the art.”
And this one, from Chris Gillebeau, The Happiness of Pursuit:
“You must believe that your quest can be successful, even if no one else does. You can deal with setbacks, misadventures, and even disasters as long as you still believe you can overcome the hardships and see your way to the end…
Whatever your quest, you, too, must believe…”
So you guys, don’t stop believing.