We want it. We seek it. We look for it. And, sometimes, we discover it was there all along.
Andrea Cairella interviewed me for Relationship Lovecast Radio. We didn’t talk about relationships, but we did talk about happiness.
You can listen in here.
If reading’s more your jam, here’s some of what was said:
AC: My goal for today’s podcast is to provide you with tools and strategies, so that you can implement them in your own life and truly see the benefits and impact not only for yourself, but also for the people you care about the most.
LL: One thing that I love to talk about which is this sort of pivotal point in my life that I love to share because it’s similar to the experience that so many other people have is this moment in my life where I had achieved everything I ever wanted to achieve–I was working as a magazine editor, I had this great office with this really nice view and all sorts of red carpet perks, VIP treatment, free clothes, free trips, all sorts of loveliness. And it was actually everything that I thought that it would be but I realized that ‘This is just not for me.’ And if happiness doesn’t come from all of this stuff I had dreamed of, then where does it come from, and how can I get some?
LL: And so that realization that I had created this life from a perspective that it was going to give me something once I got there and that I didn’t get that was huge for me. I started this process that so many people I speak with have gone through themselves of asking myself “What can I change? What more is there? Is this it? Or is there more?” And of course I realized “Yes, there is. There is so much more.” And it’s really realizing that happiness comes from within and that we get to create a life that comes from that place, rather than hoping we’ll receive it from something that’s external to us.
AC: Right. And so often we tap into or try to connect to this external stuff to try to fill an empty void that we feel. And it’s really about ‘What is it that you need, at the core of your heart?’ So what are some specific strategies that you can share of starting that, of filling that emptiness with things that can really empower us and increase the happiness and joy in our life?
LL: The first strategy is a strategy but it’s also the foundation of all of the strategies that come after this: the realization that in order to find what we’re seeking we need to look inward, and that we have the capacity to have this deeply impacted and this deeply impactful sense of a very grounded happiness and peace in our lives. And that it comes from within us rather than something we might find.
That is the most important mindset shift that I needed to make within myself and that I help other people arrive at.
LL: To realize we have the power to change our lives and our experiences.
It evolves into strategies. There’s so many of them but some of the ones I love the most is to practice this realization that we’ll have so many thoughts in a day and that thoughts are not necessarily truths. And yet, if we choose to believe them as such it will impact how we see a moment, a person, our life, the entire world. Thoughts are something we can either believe or disbelieve. That’s strategy number one.