Ever feel like you just want to slow down and let someone else take over? Read on.
Here’s the truth.
Yesterday as I was thinking of sending out a message to all of you, I got all plan’ey and master-mind’ey and ‘make things happen’ey. It’s an easy place for me to be. I’ve been a long-term planner ever since going to a high school where none of our year was mapped out for us–no mid-terms, no final exams, no deadlines for assignments. We created that our self, set our own deadlines and learning schedule, and then were in charge of making sure it happened.
So…old yang habits die hard.
Allowing for serendipity.
The idea of allowing for serendipity, that there may be something even better available if I surrendered to letting myself be guided, instead of only making my own plans take shape? That was a completely foreign concept.
And, it’s one I STILL need to remind myself of.
The truth is that yesterday I had on my to-do list to create a plan for August, and then into September, and beyond, into January.
I didn’t get to it, and I felt rushed, behind, and stressed.
When making a plan isn’t the plan
Today I said to myself, “Today, I will make my plan.”
But something else was destined to happen.
Because when I tuned in to get my Higher Self on board and have her guidance and insight into this master planning process what I got was this:
“Spend more time working less.”
And an image of me in a canoe, laying on my back, being carried.
When I said, “Yeah, but what about September? And then the months leading up to January?” my Higher Self said “Do September in September. This is about August.”
Right and true
There’s a way that I feel in my body when something is very right and true–you can feel your own right and true in your body, too–and I felt it in response to this messaging. It doesn’t make sense. It’s counter to what we are continually presented with as the way to succeed, the way to achieve your dreams, the way to make it all happen.
And, I remember.
I remember time after time when I have surrendered to this great loving source of wisdom. And what has happened when I have.
The things I’ve wanted most have always come from taking this approach.
The approach of trust, of attunement, and openness to serendipity.
A letter of loving
So, this is a letter of loving–to you and your Higher Self. May you be willing to step back, allow, and be carried.
With love, and light ahead,
No More Striving
Have you ever felt tired of ‘doing’? The rushing, the striving, the setting of goals and making them happen. The continual push towards a new bar–that you keep on raising higher. Me too.
My Surrender Experiment
Last year, inspired by other women I know and Michael Singer’s book The Surrender Experiment, I decided to say ‘yes’ to surrender.
I would spend six months allowing.
Don’t get me wrong, I still took action–but I let go of the results. I invested time in creating something, with this as my mantra: This or something better. For the highest good. If it didn’t turn out the way I had hoped, I repeated it: “This or something better. For the highest good.”
I opened myself up to requests or asks that I might otherwise have said ‘no’ to.
I decided to look at old annoyances in a new way, allowing something to be the way it was, instead of trying to make it the way I thought it should be.
I actively gave my planning over to my Higher Self, asking not what I wanted, but where Life wanted me to go next.
And it. was. beautiful.
Here’s what happened:
1. When I asked my Higher Self what steps to take in creating my next steps for my business, I got “Give a workshop at the yoga studio, for their staff.” Huh? It didn’t make any sense. I did it, anyway. A free one. And at the end, when nothing much happened–no one taking me up on my offer of how to work with me further, I simply said “This or something better. For the highest good.”
Weeks passed, and then the HR rep for the studio got in touch with me. “Can you do a training for our staff? One for all of them, and then one for our leaders?” It turned into a months-long gig.
2. Said ‘yes’ to the suggestion from a loved one that I apply to have my book assessed by the writer-in-residence at the Vancouver library–an award-winning published author with considerable street cred. I did it, despite the nerves. She disliked nearly everything about my book. And, by being honest, helped me make it better.
3. Agreed to go sailing despite the stormy, scary experience it was the last time–and made it through the roughest conditions the people I went with had ever sailed in. We went on to have a breezy trip, filled with small islands, sunshiny days, and jumping off the boat into clear, blue ocean. I can’t wait for our next trip. And, even better, I know I can handle the rough stuff.
At the end of those six months, I had my first 22K month.
How do I Talk to My Higher Self?
I have a hunch some of you might be wondering “How do I talk to my Higher Self?” There are lots of ways. This is what I have done.
1. Get two different colored pens. One is for your questioney, Small Self. The other is for your Higher Self.
2. Write down your questions from your Small Self in the pen color you chose for that part of you.
3. Set your intention that you will not question, edit, or try to figure out the response that comes from your Higher Self. That you will allow it to flow, even if it doesn’t seem to make any sense.
4. Read your first question, close your eyes, and wait for the answer. Write it down right away–remember, no editing or trying to make sense of it yet.
5. Do the same thing for the next question, and the one after that.
6. Once you’re done, sit back and read what you wrote as answers. Then, allow yourself to make sense of it. Answer this inquiry: “What do I take from this?”
With love, and light ahead,
If you never feel like you have enough time, if you feel like you’re always racing, that you can’t rest–read on. This is for you. I was there, too. And then, something magical happened.
My husband walks in the door at the end of the day. He is happy. Happy to be home, happy to see me, happy to…just be alive. I am typing furiously away on my laptop. Gettin’ things done, hammering through my to-do list, hustling. Always hustling. He comes over to give me a kiss. I tense up.
What are you doing in my space? Can’t you see I’m busy?
I’m rushing to get all this stuff done so I can–
The list never ends. There’s always more.
Is This You?
If you’re reading this, I bet it’s familiar to you. I bet you’ve experienced a day–or day after day after day–just like this.
Well, after day after day just like this, I started to wonder, what if it never ends? What if we have kids and my business and coaching keeps growing, and the book keeps selling, and all of the events and new stuff involved with that keep happening and it NEVER SLOWS DOWN?
Which is EXACTLY what is going to happen. Exactly.
What I Stopped Doing
So, where does that leave me? I either get to keep rushing and running and racing against the clock.
Or, I don’t.
I began to wonder. What if there’s another way?
A part of me remembered:
You’re more powerful than you know. Remember. Remember.
I began to notice that every time I thought to myself “There’s not enough time,” I got tense, angry, stressed. My to-do list seemed never-ending. I spent every day rushing to beat the clock. The clock always won.
So I decided to test out something radical. Something illogical.
I stopped thinking that there wasn’t enough time.
I started questioning that belief, really looking to see if it was true. And I saw that no matter what I had on my to-do list, I always had enough time to get it all done. I started to see what I’d been missing: that there were times when I finished up all of what I wanted to do–early.
You might be thinking, “That never happens to me.” Really? Have you slowed down enough to explore this and really see what you might be missing, when you’re stuck in compiling evidence that you never have enough time?
What I Started Doing
I started realizing that time is INFINITE. That there is always enough time. Are you kidding me? How could there not be enough time? Time goes on FOREVER.
click to tweet: How could there not be enough time? Time goes on FOREVER.
Each time I caught myself saying “I don’t have enough time” I said “I will always have enough time. Time is infinite.”
And my to-do list didn’t get smaller. The number of appointments, emails, events, coaching calls didn’t go down.
But day after day, week after week, I had more time. I took more breaks. I made stuff in the kitchen fresh for lunch. I watched inspirational videos. Read articles. During my workday. And day after day, week after week, I got to the middle of the afternoon and I was done. Everything on my list.
I know that when I share this with people in person they will ask me: “Yeah, but HOW? All you did was stop telling yourself you don’t have enough time? That time is infinite and goes on forever?”
That’s all I did.
Don’t try to trust it. Test it.
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